Separation Supper Club
It’s really hard to make friends when you’re an adult. When I was living on my own again the worst part was eating alone. The one thing my ex-husband and I shared was our love of food. So a three course meal with fresh rosemary from the garden, a rabbit butchered at the family farm and handmade pasta wasn’t out of the norm on. Sunday night.
I didn’t mind the nights alone - to be honest I preferred the big king sized bed to myself - but it killed me to prepare a beautiful meal and eat it by myself. My previous life was full of big dinners, homegrown vegetables and constant food-centred celebrations.
Another girlfriend who has also recently left her husband felt the same.
“My sister told me I need a supper club,” she said.
“What’s that?”
“Like a dinner party group but we’ll cook together. So it takes off the load of the host and all the people have a job so its not so awkward when you don't know people.”
“Sounds great - let’s do it.”
“I’ve been debating but not sure if I can do it myself.”
“We’ll take turns hosting and do it all together.”
So we started our supper club. We designed a hearty January menu for the first go. Pork loin stuffed with feta and cranberries, roasted beets, parsnips and carrots, a citrusy salad with raddichio and pomegranate and of course the freshest baguette and fancy grass-fed butter. We’d finished it with gelato and berries. What reasonable adult friend would say no to that?
We always set the table with proper linens. We might not have time to iron the tablecloth but we use it nonetheless. Cloth napkins. There are fresh flowers and candles on the table. We buy the groceries and print the recipes.
Then the fun begins. People start to arrive but the food is waiting for them to chop, sauté, bake and fry. The first assignment is usually the signature cocktail by one of our mixology enthusiasts attendees. With a drink in hand we set everyone to work. Conversation is just easier if you’re deciphering a recipe together or sharing duties watching the stove. Men and women both get in there and we have zero expectations. People are happy to teach each other their kitchen skills and someone always has to slice the bread if they’re brand new to these things.
If the meal is terrible, we’d have to eat it together and laugh it off together. If the meal is amazing, as it always seems to be, we have new connections and shared satisfaction of bringing together a beautiful table.
The real joy in supper club is the community we worked to build ourselves.
Serendipity graces the group every time - there’s always a connection or shared hobby you’d never expect. Like when the pretty career woman got into her passion for building computers with the nerdy jock. Or two colleagues, both in town for dinner realized they worked on the same block and had the same circles. We hear stories, secrets, laugh a lot and leave with new friends. Supper club is a safe space and a good meal.
It’s taken time but we’re getting there, and the meals alone aren’t so lonely anymore. Once a month I have supper club and that gets me through to the next one.
